Biggest Loser Update

We are nearing the finish of this little contest, where there is a $200 prize to the winner. As of week, I was in 2nd place, behind the first place MAN. Exactly 1.6 points behind.

It is even making my trainer step back. Evidently, I was never intended to be up in the running for the win. I was on the "newbie" track, to build muscle. This means gain or maintain weight mostly, with only small drops, because muscle weighs more than fat.

All other contestants have been at this for over a year and are now on the bring down primed for weight loss.

To say the least I am happy that I am near the top. Although, as the end nears, I'm not sure I want to win any more. There is a party at the end, for all the members and family's and I just don't want to be in the "light". I'm more of a stand in the back of the room kind of person any more.

Which leads me to my progress. I'm not seeing huge decreases on the scale. That issue alone would be devastating for me, if.....I didn't see the other sides. As of yesterday's weigh in, I have lost 10.8 lbs since the beginning of my journey on August 17th. 2 MONTHS have flown buy. It was my anniversary for a "new self" yesterday. :-)

What keeps me going and motivated is my closet, getting empty. I have begun wearing clothes (not that I have lived my life naked - I have always wore clothes) and when they are too big, which most have become, I wash them and move them to the "fat drawer" as I am calling it. Not that I am saving them to be fat again some day, but as a pat on the back drawer. Where I can go and put something on and see how far I have come. Which is amazingly far, when you consider the small poundage loss.

Yesterday, I found a pair of "skinnier" jeans, that I haven't wore in a loooong time, up on a shelf in my closet. I don't know why I saved them. My hubby has told me a million times to get rid of them. Anyway, yesterday I got into them. Not only did I get into them, but they are loose. I could never express to you, the pure joy that came from that.

Then there is this extra special motivation that comes from my hubby. Don't get me wrong, he has always told me I am beautiful, but I think love has colored his vision of my outward appearance. Heck, I know it had, because I was huge. I notice now, he looks at me differently. His comments, remind me of our younger years, when he couldn't keep his hands off me. Unbelievably, the most amazing feeling of being sexy is created from my hubby's reaction. Which is doing amazing changes to my look of myself.

Would I spend this huge amount of cash for this again, if given a choice? A million times over. If I am not myself, what is money worth? Nothing. That $3024 seems like a small price to pay for how I feel 2 months later.

I still have my bouts of discouragement, but over all I'm on a positive trend with the whole process.

I need to buy, yet another size smaller in pants again. But in the effort to "save" cash, I'm going to try and hold off, until I can drop 2 sizes at least. I have some belts, and unless the crotch is dropping towards my knees, like the new members of the fat drawer were, I'm going to hold off.

Regardless, I will buy new clothes prior to the holiday gatherings. I can't wait to look good in the holiday photo's again. I haven't felt or looked good since 2002.

I'm almost back!